Thursday, 3 December 2015


Here is a lie
It's like a snake
That builds up like a sum.
Then comes back
When it's big enough
To bite you
On the bum.

Wednesday, 2 December 2015

From high up on the mountain

From high up on the mountain
I walked across the land,
And swam across the lakes and seas
Out to the desert sand.
And there I met an old man,
As old as old can be,
Who leaned upon a walking stick
And said this thing to me...

"What was it that you wanted
Do tell me I implore,
Was it a bar of chocolate,
Was it an albacore?
What was it that you wanted,
Please tell me right away,
Was it some peace and quiet,
Or was it yesterday?"

As I rode on the river
And I rode on the stream
I saw the world pass by me
As if it was a dream
And there I met a woman
As old as old can be
Who leaned upon a walking stick
And said this thing to me...

"What was it that you wanted
Do tell me when you can,
Was it a thing that's lovable
Was it to be a man?
What was it that you wanted,
Please tell me it's alright,
Was it a long and happy life
Or just to start a fight?"

From high up on a mountain,
There rolled a tiny brook,
That ended in a fountain,
On the back page of a book.
And there I met a messenger
Ten thousand years too old
Who said that I should listen to
The story that he told...

"Well once there was a traveller
Who climbed a mountain high
Because he thought that he could reach
The middle of the sky.
But there he met and old man
As old as old can be,
Who whispered on a walking stick
"What do you want from me?"

Saturday, 28 November 2015


I had an Anaconda,
It was a great big snake
I loved all of the noises
Anaconda used to make.

It used to hiss and whistle,
It used to growl and moan
And then it started beeping
When it ate my mother's phone.

I had an Anaconda,
It was a great big snake,
I loved all of the noises
Anaconda used to make.

It used to bang its tail
It sounded like a drum
But when I took it to my school
It bit the teacher's bum.

Thursday, 26 November 2015

Wrap up warm.

Wrap up warm it's time to go
We're off to walk the freezing snow
We're going down to find our goal,
The icy frosty cold south pole.
We all know just what we will do,
We are the men, the Shackleton crew,
We'll sail and sail, and walk and walk,
We'll set up camp too cold to talk.

And when our ship is stuck in ice,
Ten months of cold is not that nice,
But we will leave the ship behind
And in the white see what we'll find,
The freezing sun, the howling snow,
The cutting ice the winds they blow,
We cross the ice, we come to land,
We walk some more but help's at hand.

Our leader leads we do as told
Strong and fearless, tough and bold,
Looking forwards, never back,
Until one day a heart attack,
Struck him low, but peace he found
As he was laid beneath the ground,
We know nothing could his spirit kill,
In heaven he's exploring still

Tuesday, 24 November 2015

Pasta! Basta!

I want to eat some pasta
That's not just long and straight,
I want to eat some pasta
That's looks like a garden gate.
I don't want all those swirly ones,
Or boring little tubes,
I want to eat some pasta
That looks like a tasty cubics cube,
I don't want plain spaghetti,
Ravioli or Penne,
I don't want tagliatelle,
Or Fisarmoniche
I want something that's special,
And looks like underpants,
I want to eat some pasta
That looks like tiny ants.
In fact I don't want to eat pasta
Any more and that's no lie.
If I have to eat more pasta
It must taste of cherry pie.

Sunday, 22 November 2015


There are monsters in the garden
There are monsters in the shed
There are monsters running everywhere
And jumping on the bed.
There are monsters in the kitchen
There are monsters in the bath,
There are monsters underneath the bed
And on the garden path.

There are monsters that are big
There are monsters that are small
There are monsters in the kitchen
There are monsters in the hall.

There are monsters that are orange
And there are monsters that are pink,
There are some that smell of flowers
And some that really stink.
There are monsters that are purple,
There are monsters bright and green
There's monsters that are colours
That no one has ever seen.

There are monster that are friendly,
There are monsters that say Boo!
There are monsters eating daffodils
And monsters eating poo.
There are monsters, there are monsters
There are monsters everywhere,
There are monster crawling on the ground
And floating in the air.

Well I told mum what was happening
And she said she'd come and see
And then she walked around the house
Holding hands with me...
But when I tried to show my mum
All the monsters...
It was weird..
Everywhere I took her to
They'd all just disappeared!

Build it up!

Build it up, build it up
Build out of lego or of bricks,
Build it up, build it up,
Build out of hay or out of sticks.
Build it up, build it up,
But if you don't want a shock.
You better do your building,
On a base of solid rock.

Build a friendship, build a building,
Build a poem or a song,
If you don't build it properly
It will not last that long,
So take your time and build it
As strong as strong can be,
Build it quick or build it slow,
But just build it properly.

Build a school or build a family,
Build a picture or a home
Build it out of concrete
Blocks of ice or styrofoam.
Make it strong with friendly laughter,
With cement or sticky goo,
Whatever you are building with,
Build the best that you can do.

And if you do the best you can
I'm sure that you will see,
The thing that you have built it is
The best that it can be.
The best that it can be.
The best that it can be,
If you tried hard and do your best,
Then that's what you will see

My body and myself.

My body and myself you know,
We are the best of friends
Wherever body wants to go
My self it that way sends.
If suddenly I want to run
My body it speeds up
And through these eyes each day I watch
My body growing up.

When my body it is hungry
I give it food to eat,
I look after my body,
With a healthy tasty treat.
You know I think my body is 
A special place to be,
And if I take good care of it,
It will take care of me.

Saturday, 14 November 2015


No one in my family
Has ever once had nits,
What do you think
That we all are
A bunch of stupid twits?
We do not go round the house,
Itching night and day...
If we had nits,
I tell you what,
We'd kill them right away...

My mum she'd get some dynamite
And stick it on my head,
And blow it up, and then I bet,
Those nits would all be dead...
If my dad heard that I had nits,
I think he'd probably swear,
And then he'd get a flame-thrower
And burn off all my hair,

No one in my family
Has ever once had nits,
What do you think
That we all are
A bunch of stupid twits?
We do not go round the house,
Itching night and day...
If we had nits,
I tell you what,
We kill them right away...

Uncle Jonny he's a cleaner,
And he'd know what to do,
If he once heard that I had nits,
He'd flush me down the loo.
My auntie she's a gardener,
She'd hit me with a spade,
My brother in the army says
He'd use a hand grenade,

No one in my family
Has ever once had nits,
What do you think
That we all are
A bunch of stupid twits?
We do not go round the house,
Itching night and day...
If we had nits,
I tell you what,
We kill them right away...

My Great Grand Dad's a policeman,
And mum says he's got a gun,
And if he knew, that I had nits,
It would not be much fun...
Cousin Jenny she's a baker
And she's got a rollling-pin
She says that if she beat my head
Those nits would soon give in.

No one in my family
Has ever once had nits,
What do you think
That we all are
A bunch of stupid twits?
We do not go round the house,
Itching night and day...
If we had nits,
I tell you what,
We kill them right away...

After this chat with mum and dad
I was really, really glad
That my head wasn't itchy
And I didn't feel too bad...
When they took me to the barbers,
And they sat me in a chair,
And then he got a razor out
And cut off all my hair!

No one in my family
Has ever once had nits,
What do you think
That we all are
A bunch of stupid twits?
We do not go round the house,
Itching night and day...
If we had nits,
I tell you what,
We kill them right away...

Friday, 13 November 2015


Peaceful now that war is gone,
Over fields I wave my bloodied flag,
Painted red across the minds of men,
Proud stand we now in sorrows fields
In minds and memories beneath the stars above
Endless dotted, spots of love,
Seeking silence and safety.


Mirror, mirror on the wall,
Make me grow and make me tall,
I've been a child for so long now,
Can't you grow me up some how?

I hate children!

I hate children,
That's what the teacher said.
I wish that I was back at home
Or somewhere else instead.
I don't like all that smiling,
And I don't like silly games,
I hate the way I have to learn
All of your stupid names.
So shut up and get working,
And just do what I say,
And if we're lucky,
We'll all make it
Out of here today.

Arms down!
Back straight!
Eyes front!
Mouth shut!
Feet still!
Don't move!
Books out!

I hate children,
That's what the teacher said
You're just a bunch of little worms
With nothing in your head
You know that if I had my way,
You'd all be in the street
Or sitting in a prison
With big chains upon your feet.
So shut up and get working,
And just do what I say,
And if we're lucky,
We'll all make it
Out of here today.

Arms down!
Back straight!
Eyes front!
Mouth shut!
Feet still!
Don't move!
Books out!

I hate children,
That's what the teacher said,
I wish that I was back at home
And still asleep in bed,
I hate all this teaching stuff
And trying to help you out,
I don't really care at all,
I just like to shout.
So shut up and get working,
And just do what I say,
And if we're lucky,
We'll all make it
Out of here today.

Arms down!
Back straight!
Eyes front!
Mouth shut!
Feet still!
Don't move!
Books out!

I hate children,
That's what the teacher said,
Then he just started shouting
And his face went really red,
And then he fell down on the floor
Pulling at his tie,
And his face it looked
Just like it was
A watermelon pie,
Then he went really quiet,
And we all gathered round,
And then his breathing nearly stopped
And he didn't make a sound.
And little Charlie, at the back,
Stepped up and he said,
"You know what, you lot,
I really think,
The teacher might be dead..."
But the teacher opened up his eyes,
And he gave a little yelp
"...I didn't mean the things I said,
Please go and get some help..."

But then we all looked down at him,
He was a funny sight,
His face had gone from red to green
And then a greyish white.
Well Mary then she stepped up,
And she said, right to his face,
"You're not a real teacher,
You're a horrible disgrace.
The proper teachers they're all kind
And they always help us out,
And they try hard to explain things
And they never, ever shout
And they get us to enjoy our school
And they praise the good we've done.
And even though they're strict at times,
They're funny and they're fun.
But you, you're just a bully,
And we know you hate us all
And that's not fair because you're big
And we're still young and small.
You've made our lives a misery,
And I'll tell you something true,
The only thing that we all hate,
Is teachers just like you..."

Then we all sat down in silence
And when we heard the bell
We told our favourite teachers
That the mean one was unwell.
And they all called an ambulance
And they carried him out the door,
And we never, ever, saw him
In a classroom anymore!

Wednesday, 11 November 2015


Grey as night, but deadlier than the dark
Undo the dreams of living men
Nothing remains once I have taken all.

Monday, 9 November 2015

I've got a dog...

I've got a dog whose name is Mustard,
All he ever eats is custard.

I've got a dog whose name is Jones,
All he ever eats is bones.

I've got a dog whose name is Please,
All he ever eats is peas.

I've got a dog whose name is Cat,
All he ever eats is bat.

Sunday, 8 November 2015

King Harold went to Tesco's

King Harold went to Tesco's
To buy himself a treat
And he bought a bag of sausages
And a pair of brand new feet.
And he bought himself some glasses
Just to protect his eyes,
Because he'd had a dream about,
Things falling from the skies.

William was in the shop as well,
And they both just said "Hello."
But William said "I want your crown."
Harold said "You'd better go...
I've got protective eye-ware,
And I've got an army too,
So if you're thinking of attacking me
I've some advice for you...

You're better off home on the sofa
Just get your playstation out,
And we'll do battle properly
And I'll show you what I'm all about."
"But I don't have a playstation,"
Said William in dismay
"I've got an X-box but you know
I'll beat you anyway."

So they both just played FIFA
All day long and nobody got hurt
But William was the best by far
(He wore Ronaldo's shirt.)
So they did battle, yes it's true
But heres a funny thing
Harold was a bit rubbish,
So William became King.

In 1066

King Harold and the Norman William,
They met on Senlac hill
And the two of them did battle
The other to try and kill.

And it wasn't just on a playstation
And it was a football game
It was real life and real people died
Which I think was a shame.

Well they fought and fought the whole day long
With sword with arrow and lance
Until Harold looked down from on his hill
And saw William advance.

Then finally towards evening
Beneath the darkening sky,
Apparently old Harold got,
An arrow stuck in his eye.

So then it was sort of over
With no leader his army fled
Because if they didn't run away,
They'd probably be dead.

So William became the conqueror
And built a castle with stone and bricks
And that was the Battle of Hastings,
In the year 1066.

The Princess and the Prisoner.

The princess lived inside a castle
That was huge and strong,
Where the prisoner was chained up
For something he'd done wrong.

And one day by an accident
The two of them they met,
And each one knew the other
Was what they wished to get.

So the princess helped the prisoner
And they both ran away,
And lived happily ever after
In a land far, far away.

Friday, 6 November 2015

The White and the Red.

The white and the red,
The white and the red,
We fought for the roses,
But now we are dead.

King Richard and Henry
They both claimed the throne
Man fights with an army
But dies all alone.

When battle is raging
We all fight to kill
There's no time to think
Of the blood that we spill

Some soldiers will fall
And some will survive
Some will be dead
Some still alive.

Death does not care
Upon which side we fight
Death does not care
Who is wrong or is right.

The white and the red,
The white and the red,
We fought for the roses,
But now we are dead.

Tuesday, 3 November 2015

Just twenty-four.

Three hundred viking ships,
Are waiting on the shore,
But now the battle's lost
We need just twenty-four.

The Saxons were far tougher
Than we thought they would have been,
Their fighting was more fierce
Than any we have seen.
Hardrada and Tostig,
They failed miserably in their quest,
For the Saxon Harold Godwinson,
Was strongest and the best.

We thought that our eight thousand men
Would bring us victory,
But now we've been defeated
And we're running back to sea
With only some survivors
We're sailing back today,
As we leave England behind
And depart for cold Norway.

Three hundred viking ships,
Were waiting on the shore,
But now the battle's lost
We sail just twenty-four.

Thursday, 29 October 2015


I've got a little spot upon
My shiny little nose,
I'd like it to get smaller
But it grows and grows and grows.
I don't know what to do with it,
Should I cover it or what?
Oh how can I get rid of
My nasty little spot.

Tuesday, 27 October 2015

Up to you

That was it from me this time,
So now it's up to you,
Where do you want to go?
What do you want to do?
Why not write a little verse,
About something that you like,
About your favourite sandwiches,
Or perhaps your favourite bike.

Why not write a poem that
Can make somebody smile?
Or one that makes them think a bit
Just for a little while?
Or why not write a story
From whatever's in your head?
Or write a silly word or two
About something that you've read

No matter what it is you write
I'm sure it will be good,
If you decide just what to say
And say it like you should,
So open up your head,
And then open up your mind,
And write a little something
About the strangest thing you find.

So where do you want to go?
What do you want to do?
That was it from me this time,
The rest is up to you.

Saturday, 24 October 2015

A ghost I am.

My heart is made of leather,
My head is made of sand,
My arms are put together,
Like a strange elastic band.
And when I try to speak,
I jumble up my words
And all my thoughts they fly away,
On the back of flying birds.

I haven't got a place to sleep
So I lie awake at night,
Or wander round your house alone
Waiting to give a fright
Yes it's true that I'm quite scary,
And I'm never, ever kind
I'm horrible and hairy
I'm the worst thing you could hind.

And when I'm feeling hungry
I nibble children's toes
Or cut them up and mix them
With the bogeys from my nose.
Yes, I'm a ghost, a ghost I am
But I won't give you a fright
Unless that is you wake up
In the middle of the night

Wednesday, 21 October 2015

From the Bailey

From the Bailey to the Barbican
In the battlements they wait
They peek out of the Lancet
And they stand guard at the gate.
In the turrets and the towers
On palisade and parapet
The archers are preparing
For the targets they will get.

Beyond the stinking filthy moat,
The enemies advance
With Trebuchet and battle axe
With Armour, shield and lance.
They all seem to outnumber us
In chain mail and brigandine
With siege engine, hook and tower,
The like we've never seen.

Yes we know that trouble's coming,
And are well prepared to fight
The portcullis and draw bridge
Have both been closed up tight.
We hear their drums approaching,
We pray that we will win,
For soon enough the fighting
And the battle will begin.

Sunday, 18 October 2015

Reading Books

Inside each book there is a world,
Between the letters it's been curled.

And when you read that book with me,
That world comes out for us to see.

Then you and I can travel there,
And in this world we both can share.

So come and sit with me a while,
Please read for me and make me smile.

Let's open up
And take a look,
Inside this magic,
Reading book.

The Friend Ship.

The Friend Ship sails upon the sea
And makes us smile my friends and me,

We laugh and joke and mess about,
We run and jump and scream and shout,

The Friend Ship is a happy place
And I see smiles on every face,

But you know,
I really think,
That without my friends,
This ship would sink.

Saturday, 17 October 2015

The Monster Box.

Inside the monster box
There are creatures rough and mean,
There's things that are much scarier
Than anyone's ever seen.
There's evil iguanas,
And there's dogs the size of trees,
There's molten lava leprechauns
With dragons on their knees.
There's squirrels that were born in hell,
And snakes the size of roads,
And diamond spotted liverquakes,
That feast on poisoned toads.
There's munching crunching Oggletoggs,
That gobble children up
There's hairy spotted spiders,
That are hiding in a cup.

When the monster box is open
All your nightmares come to life
The gremlin's sharp and terrible teeth,
They cut you like a knife.
And magic vines they tie you up
And hang you by your toes
And burning fire beetle moths
Put earwigs in your nose
And all the while you try to scream
But you just can't make a sound
As stinging wasps they lock you up
In a box beneath the ground.
The monster box, the monster box,
So much bigger than it seems
It looks quite small from outside,
But inside it's big as dreams.

I'd like to open up the box
And let these creatures out,
And then I'd like to watch you all
Run round and scream and shout.
But sadly, sadly, sadly
There's nothing I can do
Although I'd like to scare the
Living daylights out of you.
Because when I left my house today
I found the monster box
(It was where I always keep it
In a bag of dirty sock.)
But sadly, sadly, sadly,
As sad as sad can be,
Although I found the monster box...
I couldn't find the key.

Friday, 9 October 2015

Lighter than a feather.

Lighter than a feather, light as bright as white,
Bound up all together with the stars that shine at night.
The moon is not a mirror but it does reflect the sun
And all the light around the world reflects in everyone.

Yet still there are some places that light has never been,
Fish in deepest oceans that light has never seen.
And far off out in outer-space there's nothing light can hit,
And so the air seems dark as dark as though it were unlit.

And also in another place I know there's light but none,
Inside this little head of mine where all light is undone.
I close my eyes and I can see a world that's filled and bright,
And every thought and memory is light as bright as white.

But there's no windows in my skull my eyes don't let light in
They just connect my optic nerve to where all lights begin.
So in my head, although it's dark, I still see things so clear,
It makes me wonder if it's true and are they really here?

The things I see, the things I see, inside my darkened head,
Why can I see them there at all, and not just dark instead?


Let's just stay awake tonight,
Me and you in bed,
I've forgotten how to sleep,
So let's keep awake instead.

Let's not even close our eyes,
And let's not just relax,
Let's not let both our brains turn off,
While thinking of some facts,

Let's not just lie there dreaming
Let's not follow a thought,
Let's not just lie there thinking,
Of the thought fish we have caught.

So let's not sleep at all tonight,
Let's not even close our eyes,
Let's not think of flying,
High up in the skies.

Let's lie in bed and wide awake
And wide awake let's keep.
And then I bet that suddenly,
We'll both be fast asleep.

Thursday, 8 October 2015

The Gorgon and the Minotaur.

The gorgon and the minotaur
Were sitting down to eat
When suddenly the minotaur
Began to tap his feet.
He stood up and he gave a bow
He grabbed a violin,
And round and round the labyrinth
They both began to spin.

The gorgon's snaky hairs they sang,
To the tune that Mino played
They all did so much wiggling
That they ended in a braid.
But the gorgon and the minotaur
They danced for over and hour,
Until they both began to smell
And both needed a shower.

The gorgon and the minotaur
They kept up with the dance
And all around the labyrinth
They continued to prance
Until suddenly the music stopped,
And the gorgon stood alone,
For the minotour had looked at her
And been turned into stone.

The sounds I love

The sounds I love, the sounds I love,
I love them all you know,
I love to hear the rain
Or hear the silence of the snow,
I love to hear a happy laugh
I love when music's loud
I love to hear the roar and cheer
Of a happy football crowd.

The sounds I love, the sounds I love,
Around me everyday,
The noise of pouring water,
Or the music that I play,
The sound of drummers beating,
Or lego in a box,
Or late at night when I'm awake,
The barking of a fox.

The sounds I love, the sounds I love,
Don't you just love them too?
Or what of all the sounds we have,
Are the ones loved most by you?
And do you have a favourite?
Because I have one you see,
My little sister's footsteps,
When she comes running up to me.

Silent Poem

I'm going to write a poem,
Without a single sound,
No onomatopeia,
No words that I have found.

I will not say the word,
That's spelt B A N G
And will not let you hear the sounds
I have inside of me.

No silly, silly noises
That just don't mean a thing

I will not say GAZINGA
Nor will I stand up on a chair

I will not go crazy
And start marching round the room,
Shouting in my loudest voice,

No I do not like such silly things
I'm serious you know
And if anyone starts being silly,
Then I think it's time to go.

The light and dark.

I have one hand it cannot clap
All it does is fall and flap.
But when one hand it turns to two
Then clap I can, and clap I do.
I can play tennis on my own
But that's just stupid all alone
And tennis is so much more fun
When you can play against someone

A candle burning gives off light
That best can be seen in the night
If candles just burn in the day
Then sunlight lights their light away.
A rainy day though not much fun,
Helps us be thankful for the sun.
For in life it’s opposing things
That give us joy and give us wings

Tuesday, 6 October 2015

I am an Athenian.

I am an Athenian,
I live in ancient Greece
The land of great Odysseus
And Jason's Golden Fleece.

When you look back through history
I'm sure you'll quickly see
That your world would not be the same,
If it hadn't been for me.

We gave you your democracy,
In the Acropolis we met,
Or went into the parthenon,
The oracle's words to get.

We have Sophocles and Socrates
And Plato's thinking taught
And all of them have changed the way
That all of you have thought.

We were first to run a marathon
Or hold Olympic games
Think of all the famous Athletes
And all their famous names.

We gave you mathematics
Fantastic stories too
So many things we started
And left here just for you.

So when you think about your world,
And when your teacher speaks,
Remember the Athenian,
And all the ancient Greeks.

I am a rolling river.

I am a rolling river
And I come from far away,
I've been flowing through this channel
Every night and every day.

Attrition and erosion and
Abrasion all so strong,
They wear away the banks and bed
As I keep rolling on.

Sometimes when there's a confluence
I meet up with my friend
And then we go meandering
Around bend after bend.

Deposition and an Ox bow lake,
We leave them far behind
As we rush towards the estuary
The salty sea to find.

A stream and then a river
Until I get back to the sea,
Where all the rivers of the world
Are travelling to be.

Doctor, doctor!

Doctor, doctor
Help me quick
You see I'm feeling very sick,
My skin is green
And shiny too,
And my tongue feels
Just as big,
As you.
My eyes they bulge,
My hair is gone
I walk around
With nothing on.
My legs have grown,
And when I hop
I jump so hard
I just can't stop.

I feel like croaking
On a log,
I think I've turned,
Into a frog.

Monday, 5 October 2015

Sir Francis Drake

Well Francis Drake was a very great sailor
He sailed across the oceans wide
He used the stars for navigation
And knew all about the winds and tide.

So much gold and so much silver
More than any man has seen,
He took from those who first had stole it
And brought it back to the British Queen.

So pleased was she with all his efforts
And all the treasures he gave to her
She honoured him with a royal knighthood.
From then on he was known as 'Sir'.

That great man Drake a life at sea,
In tiny boats on a raging tide
No doubt that he was born for sailing,
From his childhood till the day he died

Sir Francis Drake whom the Spanish hated,
Because he always managed to flee,
A privateer every remembered,
Buried far off out at sea..

Explorer Box.

I've got a little explorer box,
That used to be filled up with sock,
But when I put it on my head,
It takes me somewhere new.

I've been to many far off lands
Of frosty winds and golden sands
Held priceless jewels in my hand
That made me think of you.

I've been beneath the stormy seas,
And climbed with monkeys up in trees,
Floated on a summer's breeze,
With diamonds in my shoe

Yes, you can see it in my face,
That I've explored the moon and space
And on the earth been every place,
But I'd like to take you too.

So please, please come along with me,
And tell me what you'd like to see,
When we put our heads inside my box
That used to be filled up with socks.

Sunday, 4 October 2015

In Stone Age times...

In Stone Age times there were no phones,
But they had flint and great big stones...
There were no supermarkets yet,
No cash machines or internet,
No motor cars, no trips to mars,
No ipads and no chocolate bars.

And isn't it quite strange to think,
No stone aged man tried fizzy drink?
And none of them would ever have seen,
A hoover or a TV screen.
And stone aged man he never saw,
A milkshake or a sliding door,
Electric lights or satellites,
Bicycles or flying kites,
And he'd never heard of football teams
Or tasted Big Macs or ice creams

And don't you think it would have hurt his brain
If he'd seen an aeroplane?
Or watched someone blow up a balloon,
Or knew that men walked on the moon?

Oh what would you think?
Oh what would you think?
What would you, what would you,
What would you think.

If all of us here now,
Could travel back in time somehow.
And what do you think you would miss most then,
If we lived in the age of stone aged men?

Thursday, 1 October 2015


A stone age man whose name was Ogg,
Was the first to train a dog.
He taught him how to hunt and walk
Then tried to teach him how to talk.

But as you know, and books they tell,
Dogs do not talk so very well.
So poor old Ogg was bound to fail...
The dog did nothing but wag his tail.

Yet still the dog and Ogg were good,
Their friendship worked out as it should.
The dog learnt how to hunt and fight
And kept guard over Ogg at night.

The dog was comfort and a friend
So much so that in the end.
All those that saw the great man Ogg,
Went out and got themselves a dog.

So now when you walk in the street,
And see a dog at someone's feet.
Then spare a thought for good old Ogg,
The first man ever to train a dog.

Monday, 7 September 2015

So hungry.

So hungry were the dinosaurs,
When they came into the house,
The ate up all the knives and forks
And then they ate the mouse.

And they went around the bend
And ate up all the stairs
And when they'd eaten all of them,
They ate up all the chairs.

Well next they ate the TV,
The book shelves and a pram,
Then afterwards made sandwiches
Of buttered bread and jam.

"Get out of here you dinosaurs!"
I screamed and made a fuss.
"Get out of here this minute,
And leave some food for us."


I closed my eyes and had a dream
About a Brontosaurus,
Who sang a song and danced about
The minute that he saw us.

He danced upon the desert sands
He danced beneath the sea
Then sang a song upon a rock
Called 'How strange dreams can be'

I woke up on the morning
And I told my mum and dad
All about the strangest dream
I think I've ever had.

They said that dreams are nothing
'Think of something else instead.'
But now I've got a Brontosaurus
Dancing in my head.

The T-Rex

The T-Rex gives a mighty roar:
"I'm the most famous dinosaur!"

But just there watching all the while,
Is the smiling crocodile.

Who says with glee and snapping jaws,
"But my descendants will outlive yours..."

The T-Rex says "It can't be true,
I'm far bigger and better than you."

But croc says "No I'll still be around,
When you're just bones stuck in the ground."

Monday, 6 July 2015

All those names!

Well what a lot of difficult names
The dinosaurs have got
Don't you think the scientists
Should rearrange the lot?

Because what's Sauropelta?
Or a Liopleurodon?
And how angry's a Spinosaurus
When his food is nearly gone?

And while we're on the subject
What's an Argentinosaur?
And is it ever  really loud
When the Eoraptors roar.

So I think the paleontologists
Should stop their silly games
And give all of these dinosaurs
Some lovely simple names

Like Red and Blue and Black and Green
Or numbers One to Ten
So we won't have to learn all of those
Difficult names again.

The Sauropods.

When the sauropods are coming
Then the ground begins to shake
Can you hear the terrible, terrible
Terrible noise they make?

With feet the size of motor cars
And legs the size of trees
They're walking through the forest
With their great big wobbly knees?

The sauropods, the sauropods
Diplodocus and friends
Imagine sliding from his head
To where his tail it ends

Imagine being mistaken
For a tasty leafy treat,
Imagine being sat upon,
Or squashed beneath his feet.

The sauropods look wonderful
In all the books we know,
But if we could travel back in time
Do you think that we should go?

Because maybe they're a bit too big,
And less friendly than they seem
And if we saw them in real life
We might just stand and scream.

Tuesday, 9 June 2015

The Panda's Eyes

The Panda,
Has two lovely eyes,
And eats bamboo,
And smiles and sighs.

But when he's homesick,
Then he cries,
And floods of tears
Fill Panda's eyes.

Monday, 8 June 2015

In Just a Little While

It's time for me to leave you now
It's time to say goodbye.
But I've had such a lovely time,
I almost want to cry.

It's time for me to leave you now
Though I really don't want to go.
But thanks so much for having me
It's been great fun you know.

So thanks for having me today
I hope I've made it clear.
That I would love to come again
Perhaps this time next year?

So, though it's time for me to leave
I'm happy and I'll smile
For I'll be coming back you know
In just a little while.

So, though it's time for me to leave
I'll be back in a while.
So don't feel bad and don't feel sad
Just wave and give a smile.
For I'll be coming back you know
To see your happy smile.
Yes, I'll be coming back again
In just a little while.

The Longest Neck.

The giraffe his neck it is so long
That when he wants to sing a song
It takes an hour to come along
That neck, that neck,
So very long.

And when he wants to give a shout
It takes so long to get it out
That he's forgotten all about
The reason why,
He wished to shout.


Now it's time for me to go
It was good fun to say hello
But now there's nothing left to show
And so I really have to go
Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye.

Tuesday, 19 May 2015

Daisy Dormouse.

Daisy Dormouse snored and snored
She snored so much,
She almost roared.
When she woke up,
She just felt bored.
And so she slept and slept and slept.
And all the animals she kept,
Awake all night
In such a fright
Because they thought a tiger bright
Was roaring, roaring,
In the night.

But the roar was not a tiger bright,
Just Daisy Dormouse,
In the night,
Boring, snoring,
Sleeping tight,
And dreaming of
A tiger's bite,
That gave her such
A dreadful fright
She roared just like
A tiger might
Out in the scary
Forest night.

Thursday, 14 May 2015

Snails on snow.

Snails on snow,
Snails on snow,
They just don't know
Which way to go,
They slide around
And round and round,
Till tails and heads
Just can't be found.

Snails on ice,
Snails on ice,
They can not listen
to advice,
They slip and slide
And glide and ride,
Across the icy

Oh snails are better in the sun
Where they can walk
And they can run
And they can stick,
Their sticky shoe,
Onto the earth,
With goo goo.

Wednesday, 13 May 2015

My Cousin Andy

My cousin Andy’s got a six-foot nose
And sixteen purple Pigeons
That whistle on his toes
And when he goes to bed at night
Twelve monkeys guard his bed
And seven yellow spiders
Spin dreams around his head

My cousin Andy’s got a Chinese saw
And a ticket from Mongolia
And a book on Aztec law
And when he swims out in the sea
He grows an orange tail
And makes a meal of sausages
In the belly of a whale

My cousin Andy’s got a bed that flies
And a car that’s made of marmalade
And forty-seven eyes
And when he wrestles dinosaurs
Then I know he always wins
Because I read it in a letter
That he once sent to the twins

My cousin Andy’s got a sweet shop too
And a gang of talking pictures
And a pot of magic glue
And when he sits up on the roof
He can name you all the stars
And he says he’s been to Pluto
And I know he’s been to Mars

Yes, my cousin Andy’s the best one in the world
He’s even got a little box
In which a snake is curled
And daddy says that one fine day
When he’s saved up all his money
Then we’re going to visit Andy
In the land of milk and honey

Saturday, 9 May 2015

The seeds succeed.

The seeds they wait to germinate
Until three needs are met
A place to stay, a sunny day
And water they must get.

And then they start to grow and grow
To reach up to the sun,
It happens to them all you know,
Every single one.

They grow some roots
That go deep down,
They grow a leafy
Type of crown,
All they need
Is lots of light,
And a chance
To rest at night,
And some water,
And some earth,
And then they grow
For all they're worth.

Look at the wonders of creation
Grown from seeds and germination.


What is photosynthesis?
(Apart from a long word)
It's really quite important,
For all the plants I've heard.

It's something about breathing,
And carbon dioxide,
But I don't really understand,
No matter how I've tried.

It's something about water
And sun and dark and leaves,
And something about oxygen
Which every plant it breathes.

In school my teacher told me,
His name was Mr Rotten,
It's something about glucose,
But now I've quite forgotten.

So can you tell me anything
About a word as long as this
I'd really like to know, you know
What's photosynthesis?

Coconut eggs?

The Coconut, the Coconut,
He sprouted arms and legs,
And then he ran off down the road,
Looking for some eggs.

And when he finally found some,
He scrambled them for lunch,
And went off eating breakfast,
Munchy! Munchy! Crunch!

The Coconut.

The coconut, the coconut,
A great big seed indeed,
One day he sprouted arms and legs
Ran down the road
And weed!

Sunday, 26 April 2015

The Ants! The Ants!

The Ants! The Ants!
They're marching all
Along the forest floor
They've got to carry bits of figs
And leaves, and fruits and more
They carry them into the nest
And pack them in the store
Where they feed the little fungus
That's the food that they adore.

The Ants! The Ants!
There's billions of them
Walking in the trees
And round the other animals
And tickling their knees
They jumped upon the orangutang
And on the chimpanzees
And when they met the jaguar
They made him want to sneeze

The Ants! The Ants!
They're marching so
You'd better get out of the way
They're cleaning up the forest
And they don't have time to play.
They're hurrying and scurrying
They're working night and day
And if they think you're tasty
Then they'll carry you away.

The Ants! The Ants!
They're happy and they're
Blowing up balloons,
They're eating bowls of custard
Using Multi-coloured spoons.
They're jumping and they're pumping
And they're hiding in the dunes,
They're dancing and they're prancing
And they're singing silly tunes..

Saturday, 25 April 2015

Timmy Toucan

Little Timmy Toucan
Was feeling rather weak
It wasn't easy flying round
With such a massive beak

And so he sat down in a tree
And had a little break
He drank a glass of lemonade
And ate some chocolate cake

And then he felt much better
So he flew back to his nest
Where tired Timmy Toucan
Had another little rest.

Friday, 24 April 2015

Ant Haiku.

Tiny tiny ants
Together and all alone
Still working as one


The sloth, the sloth he is so slow,
He takes an hour to move a toe
So nobody can ever know,
Which way it is he wants to go.

The sloth, the sloth such pretty eyes,
He's like a tree that's in disguise,
As still as still, just where he lies,
Eating leaves and watching flies.

The sloth, the sloth that pretty face
He moves with elegance and grace
He does not want to win the race
And keeps the very slowest pace

The sloth, the sloth is teaching me,
That rushing round is not the key
So just slow down and simply be
Like smiley sloth up in his tree.

Thursday, 23 April 2015

Connie the Capybara.

Connie the Capybara
Was trying to get some rest
But Antony the Anteater
Was being a terrible pest,
He said that by an accident
He’d got ants in his nose
And then he just kept sneezing
Every time she tried to doze.

So Connie got two Tree frogs
And shoved them in her ears
But they just tickled her so much
That she broke down in tears.
And so she got a water lily
Which she tied upon her head
And then at last she fell asleep
When she went back to bed.

Monday, 20 April 2015

Angry Auntie Antonella

Angry Auntie Antonella
Ate the top of an umbrella
Ate a sundial and a heater
And a rusty watermeter

Angry Auntie Antonella,
Ate six eggs with salmonella,
Ate her bedroom and her house,
And even ate a little mouse.

Angry Auntie Antonella
Buttered sunshine with Nutella
Ate a wind-chime and some rain
And a great big weather vane

Angry Auntie Antonella
Ate a hurricane called Stella
Ate the moon and stars for fun
And all the planets one by one

Angry Auntie Antonella
Big and tall and interstellar,
Ate the sun like it was cake
But then she made a HUGE mistake...

In the dark,
With no food on her shelf,
Angry Auntie ate HERSELF!

Friday, 17 April 2015

Clap your hands!

Clap your hands!
Clap your hands!
Have a wiggle,
Stamp your feet.
I tell you all that exercise,
Is really quite a treat!

Jump around!
Jump around!
Jump up high,
And fall back down.
You know that when you're laughing,
It's impossible to frown!

Dance about!
Dance about!
Do the shimmy,
Scream shout.
I tell you all that fun and games,
Is what life's all about!


Butterfly, butterfly
Come and sing for me
Remind me of the way
That living used to be.
Let me see you spread your wings
And fly so prettily,
Dancing there inside the sun
Beneath the willow tree.

Butterfly, butterfly
How long do you live?
Do you know what love is like,
And what it's like to give?
Are you sometimes depressed,
Or usually happy?
Dancing there inside the sun
Beneath the willow tree.

Butterfly, butterfly,
Do you always roam,
Do you always wander,
Or have you got a home?
Have you ever been
To the shores of Italy
And watched all of those children
Splashing in the sea?

Butterfly, butterfly
If only you were me
And I was you dancing there
Beneath the willow tree.
I tell you right now,
I would surely have some fun,
I'd spread my wings
And disappear
Into the belly of the sun.

Thursday, 2 April 2015

How I grow.

I know, I know and I will tell
How it is I grow so well
I eat my fruit and eat my veg
And jump over my garden hedge.
I do lots and lots of exercise
And don't eat chocolate box surprise
Instead I eat some nuts and peas
And then I grow with strength and ease.

River Drink.

The river's deep, the river's long
The river sings a funny song.
It swirls around and bubbles up.
And if it's clean I get a cup
And have a great big river drink
Before I lie back down and think

Monday, 23 March 2015

Chocolate Cheese...

Once there was a little mouse
Who really loved his cheese
But sadly for the little chap
It often made him sneeze

And so the mouse
He learned to bake
And made himself
A chocolate cake

And then the clever little fellow
To make it cheesy,
Sprayed it yellow.

Monday, 2 February 2015

One day my house...

One day my house it grew some feet
And went off walking down the street,
And then it grew an orange roof
And purple walls that are waterproof.

Oh my house is happy it always smiles
But it can run for miles and miles...
It hurried off to Timbuktu
Then Eden Park and Waterloo
And next it ran straight down to Rome
But luckily then my house ran home.

Sunday, 1 February 2015

Simon and the rain

Simon was a happy man
He loved the sun and heat
He loved to bake potatoes
And loved to rub his feet

But what made Simon happiest
Again, again, again
Was dancing round in swimming trunks
Inside the summer rain.

Saturday, 31 January 2015

Jumping Fish

I closed my eyes and saw a fish
That swam inside my head
Who laughed at all the people
That were jumping on my bed.

But then the jumping people
And the funny little fish
They ran into my sister's room
And jumped inside a dish.

Friday, 30 January 2015

Don't wake me up.

When I sleep
My head is full
Of funny things
That kick and pull.

Like boxes that can play guitars
Or yellow birds that come from Mars.
There's one legged goats that like to sing
And three-legged birds that all say "Ping!!!"
And Elephants that pull down trees
With fish that all have dirty knees.
There's floating bits of Marmite toast,
And flying eggs that like to boast.
There's monkeys and Orangutangs
And cardboard boxes that have fangs.
Yes when I sleep, I see these things
And sometimes all of them have wings...

But when I wake
It's really weird
All these strange things
Have disappeared.

Thursday, 29 January 2015

When I am watching...

When I am watching stars at night
And when I fly my sister's kite
I think about how small I am...
And I feel little like a lamb

But when I watch the birds that fly
And when I see the bright blue sky
Well then I think I'm made of iron
And I feel stronger than a lion.

Wednesday, 28 January 2015


Doctor, doctor help me quick
I think I'm feeling very sick,
My tongues gone rough,
My skin's grown fur,
And I can't speak no more
I purr...

I really want to climb in trees
And suddenly I've got four knees
I've got sharp nails (they're almost claws)
And really sharp teeth in my jaws.

All I want is fish and milk
My fur's so smooth it feels like silk
What would you think
If I said that...
I think I've turned
Into a cat?

Tuesday, 27 January 2015

Inside the Whale

Inside the whale there was a mouse
That lived inside a tiny house
And all day long the mouse sang songs
And played the flute and banged on gongs

Until the great big whale he said
"All this noise inside my head
It's just too much you have to go."
And then he gave a great big blow

And so the mouse, out of control,
Came flying from his squirty-hole
He flew right up into the sky
And hit a black bird passing by!

Monday, 26 January 2015

The Sleepy Ghost.

There was a sleepy little ghost
Whose heart was full of dread,
Because he thought another ghost
Was underneath his bed.

And so he moved and went to sleep
In the place he loved the most,
Underneath the creaky bed,
Of another sleeping ghost.

Sunday, 25 January 2015

River Rhyme.

By the river Severn
I counted to eleven
And by the river Torridge
I ate a bowl of porridge

By the river Tees
I washed my dirty knees
And on the river Lune
I sang a little tune

By the river Gipping
I couldn’t keep from skipping
And by the river Thame
I had to do the same

I swam the river Rother
Without the slightest bother
But as I crossed the Dee
I got washed out to sea!

Saturday, 24 January 2015

The little car.

The little car was feeling sad
He'd run right out of fuel
And so he made himself feel glad
By eating loads of gruel.

And then he drove around the town
And over hill and dale
And round and round in circles
Until he caught his tail.

Friday, 23 January 2015

Eating flowers.

I'm sitting in the garden
Eating lots of flowers,
I can sit and eat them all
For hours and hours and hours.

And when I'm feeling really full,
I rush up to the loo,
And do a little wee wee,
And have a great big poo!

Thursday, 22 January 2015

Harvey's box.

Harvey's got a box of tricks
That when he's sad
He sometimes kicks.

But when he's happy
For a treat
He dances with it
In the street!

Tuesday, 20 January 2015

The Rabbits Jump

The rabbits jump
They jump and jump
They jump into the sky,
And disappear behind the cloud
That's made of cherry pie.

The lobsters in the sea they run
They run and run and run
And float upon the little boat
That's made of cherry bun.

And cherries in my dream arrive
And jump on rabbits' toes
And chase away the lobsters
Who all run up my nose.

And then I sneeze,
And sneeze and sneeze
And oh I must confess
I cover all my hands and face
With snotty lobster mess.

Upside down.

Can we have our lunch for breakfast
And our breakfast for our tea
And can I eat my cereals
Up in the yellow tree?
Can I go to bed right now
And wake up yesterday?
Could you try to teach me how,
Would that be okay?

Can I walk up on the stars
Can the birds fly in the sea?
Would you ever hold my hand
And fly away with me?
Can all my dreams come true right now
Or at least by Saturday
Could you try to teach me how,
Would that be okay?

Monday, 19 January 2015


Emily-Emily sing me a song
Make it all happy and not very long
Make it about all the stars in the sky
And all of the things that I see with my eye.

Sing me a song about leopards and bears
Sing me a song about tables and chairs
Sing me a song about stars in the night
Sing about walruses flying a kite
Sing me a song about apples and cake
Sing me a song about learning to bake
Sing me a song about peacocks and tails
Sing about dolphins riding on whales.
Sing about night-time, sing about day
Sing about children learning to play.

Emily sing me a song I can keep
Dear Emily-Emily
Sing me to sleep.

Sunday, 18 January 2015

The Frog, the frog, the frog.

The frog, the frog, the frog
He jumped off of his log
Straight into the steamy-stinky
Stinky, stinky bog.

And happy as can be
He swam around with me
Until we found a kayak
And paddled it out to sea.

Friday, 16 January 2015

Elephant, Elephant

Elephant, Elephant
Your skin is all grey
You're covered in wrinkles
And munching on hay.
But I know that last week
You were dancing with the bears
While juggling bananas
And eating juicy pears.

Elephant, Elephant
I laugh so much I cry
When you shower icy water
On the Zoo keeper and I.
But I remember last month
You were jumping up and down
Upon your favourite trampoline
Dressed up as a clown.

Elephant, Elephant
What time is it today
That you will play the violin
And chase the clouds away?
'Cause I remember last year
That you had a big balloon
And filled it up with helium
And flew off to the moon.

Thursday, 15 January 2015

Hot and Cold

The wind is hot,
The wind is cold
Both of these things
I have been told.

But no one warned me
The wind would blow
my hat away.

Wednesday, 14 January 2015


Inside a glass of orange juice
There swam a little fish,
Who said that if I sang for him
He would grant me a wish.
And so I sang a little song
About a little fish,
Who swam around in orange juice
And granted me a wish.

Inside a glass of orange juice
There swam a little fish
Who said that if I danced for him
He would grant me a wish.
And so I danced a little dance
About a little fish.
Who swam around in orange juice
And granted me a wish.

Inside a glass of orange juice
There swam a little fish
Who said that if I told a joke
He would grant me a wish.
And so I told a little joke
About a little fish.
Who swam around in orange juice
And granted me a wish.

The little fish he granted
Me wishes one, two, three
And then politely asked if
I would set him free.
And so I poured the orange juice
Out into the sea
And then the little fish he
Waved goodbye to me.

Tuesday, 13 January 2015

Mr Platypus

My friend the Duck-billed Platypus
He ate a great big cake
But when he tried to swim again
He got a belly ache.

And so he bought a little boat
And sailed it out to sea,
Where he had a lovely picnic
With his Duck-bill friends and me.

Monday, 12 January 2015

Happy's here to stay.

This is Mr Happy
He's a little clown
And when he plays the mandolin
He does it upside down.

Mr Happy's happy
He's dancing in the hay
And sings a little song for us,
Called Happy's here to stay.

Sunday, 11 January 2015

Jumping Sid.

My pet spider Jumping Sid,
When he got scared he often hid
Between my dirty little toes,
Or deep inside my snotty nose.

But Jumping Sid
He wasn't pleased,
When his legs tickled,
And I sneezed!

Saturday, 10 January 2015

Bob's Job

He loved his Job
Cleaning out the loo...

But sad to tell,
One day he fell,
Into a pile of poo.

Friday, 9 January 2015

Mouse in the house?

Last night I thought I heard a mouse
Running round inside my house.

But when I did investigate
I found my little sister Kate...

Sitting in her underwear,
Rubbing biscuits in her hair.

Thursday, 8 January 2015

The Windy Wind

When the windy wind it blows
I hope it doesn't take my nose
It's very useful when I smell
And so's a bar of soap as well

And when the snowy snow it falls
I can't help walking into walls
It's my fault though, I get a fright,
I painted all my walls in white!

Wednesday, 7 January 2015

Frosty Cold

When the weather's frosty cold
No-one does what they've been told
So all the teachers scream and shout
And put their gloves on inside out.

But when the weather's warm and hot
Then no one does what they should not
So all the teachers smile instead
And wear their knickers on their head!